I consider myself a loyal person.
That’s why when my sister called to tell me she was going into labor, I was in the car quicker than she could finish her sentence.
When I went into labor, I expected the same treatment.
I expected her to drop everything just like I did. I expected her bags to be packed (just like mine), and for her to be willing to stay the night, if that’s what I needed from her, but she didn’t.
She instead decided that showing up for work was more important. I, of course, was hurt. I felt like I didn’t matter enough to her for her to drop what she was doing to see me through that time in my life, but my perception was wrong.
I didn’t notice that my perception was off until I was sitting in my hospital room and I noticed how peaceful it was.
My hubby was breathing and preparing himself for the arrival of our son and the nurses were quietly walking in and out to monitor the baby’s heartbeat and mine. As I sat there in peace, I noticed the perfection of the moment.
I noticed that what I thought I wanted and what I really wanted, were two very different things.
I really wanted my son’s birth to be between me, my significant other, and the earth angels (the doctors and nurses), that were called to bring him into the world.
I realized that I didn’t want or need anyone else to be there, but the one who had seen me at my most vulnerable and that knew how important the birth of my son was to me.
I also realized how important it was for my significant other to have his privacy as well. You see, he had lost a child from a previous relationship, and this was a very momentous and somewhat frightening occasion for him as well.
The universe had lined up circumstances and events that led me and my significant other to what we really wanted and not to what we thought we wanted. God saw the bigger picture. God knew that I wouldn’t want my sister’s job to be in jeopardy and also knew that I didn’t want anyone in the room that would be worried or resentful for being there.
The birth of my son was perfect.
The people that were supposed to be there – were there, and it turned out better than I could have imagined. I just needed to let go of the idea that something was going wrong, and open to the fact that things were really working in my favor.
So if you are going through something right now that doesn’t seem to be working out the way that you had planned, just realize that you are on your way to something better. You are in good hands and you are being guided to your heart’s real desire and not just to what you think you desire.
Thanks for reading!