It’s Okay Not To Be Okay

loneliness

I use the dental office as a place to practice my skills of patience and ease.

You see, I hate the dentist (the uncomfortable chair, not being in control, the pain that comes with getting work done on my teeth) – absolutely hate it.

But I use that uncomfortable place as a testing ground for centering myself. It’s where I let myself know that it’s okay to be uncomfortable. It’s where I show myself that it’s okay to feel pain and uneasiness and that I don’t have to hide or run away from it.

You may be going through some pain right now too.

There may be some uneasiness, discomfort, a difficult situation, or insert unpleasant feeling “here” that you may be experiencing.

I am here to tell you that it’s okay to feel the way that you do.

You are going to have bad days sometimes, and that’s okay.

You are going to be unhappy sometimes and that’s okay.

Don’t let anyone make you feel like your feelings are not worthy of being explored, felt fully, and expressed.

Sometimes it seems like the world is so quick to try to make you put on a happy face or fake that everything is okay – as if there is no room for any imperfections or negative feelings at all, but the more you resist your pain, frustration, and anger – the more it shows up.

“What you resist, persists.” C.G. Jung

So what does the dental office have to do with all of this?

Well, it’s where I show myself that no matter what I am feeling – I can adjust home.

It’s where I practice trusting the moment, the skill of the doctor, and trusting my own ability to make it through whatever pain I may experience. I notice that when I loosen up and allow, it makes for a much smoother experience. Whenever you are facing an uncomfortable situation, see if you can start to view the situation as an opportunity to see how much you have grown or to practice adjusting home.

I realize that I have everything I need to make it through and so do you.

No matter what situation you are going through.

So experience it all – the pain, the frustration, the anger, and the disappointment with things not going your way. It’s okay to admit that you have these feelings and I’ll let you in on a secret – it’s okay to feel. It means that you’re human – not that you are unworthy or bad – but human.

So feel it fully and adjust home. Feel it fully and adjust home. Feel it fully and adjust home. Ride the discomfort, but have compassion for yourself and steady yourself in the midst of the storm.

Trust yourself.

Trust the process.

Trust your ability to make it through.

I’m not going to promise you that you will never have another bad day, but I will say that you will no longer have to be a slave to your pain or a prisoner to your discomfort. With practice, you will learn how to face it, embrace it, and find your center easier.

You will make it through.

Face your fears, embrace your pain, and set it free – are your ready for a BREAKTHROUGH?

Thanks for reading!

Renee B.

Intuitive Guide & Inner Work Specialist

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What Pregnancy Taught Me About Letting Go

letting go

I am a control freak.

Most of the time I want to know where, when, why, and how something is going to happen.

I am the kind of person that gets anxiety from waiting for surprises and gets very annoyed when I can’t figure out what’s coming next.

Let me tell you that pregnancy took the “control freak” in me and humbled it.

There was nothing that I could do from the moment that I found out I was pregnant. I was ecstatic, but very much afraid that I would have no control over the process.

I would have to spend 9 months not knowing what my surprise looked like. I would have to wait to hold my baby in my arms. I would have to go to sleep not knowing if everything was going to be okay, and wake up to anxiety attacks because I wasn’t sure if I could support my child, and if I was fit to be a good mother.

All that waiting, anxiety, and not knowing, and there wasn’t a damn thing that I could do about it.

Life is like that too. You build a business or try to follow your dreams and you have no idea what the outcome is going to be. You have to spend months – sometimes years waiting for your dreams to grow, but just like having a child, you have to trust in the unseen.

You just have to hope for the best, keep yourself in good health, allow yourself to grow, and face the challenges that come along with trying to nurture something into the world. I had no control over my baby’s development. I didn’t know how many fingers and toes he would be born with. I didn’t know if I was going to have all the stuff that I needed to make him comfortable when he was born.

But because it was my heart’s desire to bring a child into this world, everything that I needed showed up.

I realized that I didn’t have to be so afraid, and that I didn’t have control over the process anyway. All I could do was relax into what had the potential to be a great experience if I let it.

I have to tell you that I let it be the experience that I believed in, and it was wonderful.

I now get to see my gift (my son) everyday. Everyday there is something new that I love about him. I allowed myself to receive what I really desired – regardless of not knowing exactly what the outcome was going to be.

If there is one thing that I want you take away from this post, it’s that life is unpredictable sometimes. You cannot control every aspect of it, and it’s exhausting to try. All you can do is expect the best, trust in the people that are around you to do what they came to do, trust in your ability to nurture yourself into the flow of receiving, and then watch the experience manifest into something beautiful.

Thanks for reading!

Here are some photos of my son.

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Are You A Life Hypochondriac?

Hypochondriac

Most of you know what a hypochondriac is.

For those of you that don’t – it’s a person that is abnormally concerned about their health.

A life hypochondriac (a made-up term of course), is someone who is constantly worried about the state of their being, their life, and the world that they live in. They live in a state of fear and paranoia about every little thing, and it makes it very difficult for them to accept new ideas that may help them progress in the direction of their true potential.

If you could read their mind, you would hear thoughts like,

“Is this okay, did I do that right, do I look fat, am I enough, did I do that well, is something going to go wrong, and are things going to work out for me?”

I must admit that I too, have been a life hypochondriac. I have questioned my very existence here. Do I belong, am I okay, if I say that – will I step on anyone’s toes?

That is a miserable state of being to live in.

Your breathing is a clear sign that you are meant to be here.

I am not sure why you question if you are going to make it out of a situation alive – because you always do.

I am not sure why you question your decisions – because somehow, someway you always wind up at the right place.

I am not sure why you doubt yourself because even if you mess up – every moment is brand new, and life always throws you another opportunity to get it right.

I know how unsettling it is to move into new territory. I know how nerve-racking it is to explore different parts of the self, and how terrifying it is to try and change your beliefs. It kind of reminds me of being a new parent. When your child is first born, everything is a reason to call the doctor. Everything seems wrong.

Is my child breathing okay, is he crying too much, how many times does he have to pee or poop, is this tiny little bump on his or her nose a cause for concern?

I get it.

You want to question everything. You want to make sure things are right. You are a concerned parent, and you want to make sure you are paying attention and making the right decision for your child at all times.

The same goes for life. You want to make sure you are making the right moves and that you are headed in the right direction.

The thing is… life is always going according to plan.

You can go with the flow or you can make things hard for yourself. You can worry or you can ease up a little bit. You can stress over things or you can trust that things will work out for you no matter what the process is or how long it takes to get to your desired destination.

You see, that’s why I like doctors. They are there to ease your worries. They have more information about the topics that run rampant in your mind. They know more. So when you call up the doctor frantic about your child having a minor fall, they can calm your heart and tell you to ease up a little bit. Why do you trust them? Because you believe that they know more than you do and that they know what they are talking about.

It’s the same way with your life force, God, and your inner being. It is asking you to ease up a little bit and trust more because it knows more about the subject matter of life and your trajectory – than you think it does.

Messages are always being sent to you.

Another path is always lighting up for you.

You are always being guided in the right direction; whether you believe it or not.

Now don’t get me wrong, you can doubt yourself, take a detour, and get lost, but eventually you will find your way.

I know how it feels to feel disconnected and to not trust life, and believe it or not, alot of that stuff stems from the past. Perhaps a parent didn’t show as much care and attention as you had hoped for, or maybe someone didn’t encourage your potential, or maybe someone rejected you in the past – I get it. So now when you think of going through life, you question everything, you worry, and wonder, and fret.

The key is to ease up and trust life a little more.

Your life force is backing your entire existence. It doesn’t want you to fail. It is putting its time and attention into your existence because it knows who you are, what you are, and what you have the potential to be in this world.

I know it’s hard and I know you have been told this before in other ways, but this message is coming back around to you again in a more loving way. Life wants to express itself through you. You were born as a channel for this energy. The only way that life can express itself through you (easily), is if you give it the room to.

So trust that you are here because you are meant to be here. If you need help believing again or trusting in the process – this may help.

Trust that life has chosen you (your personality, your skill sets, your talents and gifts) to express itself in a way that has never been expressed before.

You are no accident. Your presence is not an accident. Your existence is not an accident.

Ease up and let life show you how good it can be.

I know it seems easier said than done, but a little practice goes a long way.

Just Imagine

How great would it be to get some space between you and your problems, to find hope in a brighter future, and to learn to trust yourself again? I can work with you to help you in these areas and here’s how.

 Thanks for reading!

heart Nay

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The Unknown, Anxiety Attacks, & Putting It All Into Perspective

Inner Peace

I had a dream last night that inspired this post.

For a while I have been interested in the feelings that we have and where they arise from.

For the past couple of weeks I have been experiencing panic attacks. They seemed to come out of the blue, and I couldn’t understand why I started to get them. The only other time I ever had such a thing happen was a couple of years ago when I thought I was pregnant, and wasn’t adequately prepared (financially) to have a child.

Other than that – I have never had panic attacks before.

So they started coming out of nowhere, and I decided to try and figure out what the hell was going on inside of me to cause me to have 25 minute panic attacks.

While decoding someone’s dream yesterday, I defined what evil and darkness really is. I called evil and darkness – a loss of light, fear of uncertainty, fear of the unknown, loss of control, and thoughts and circumstances that cause you to lose touch with your “God-Self” or your “Light-Self”.

Decoding that dream helped me realize what my panic attacks were in relation to. For the past couple of years I have been going through some major transformations. My foundation is shifting, my thoughts and beliefs are too, and everything that I was taught to be true about life is now being called in for questioning.

When you are trying to better yourself and break old habits, the “familiar” in you doesn’t want to go so easily. The “familiar” in me is the part that holds on for dear life because to get rid of the “familiar things” would (in my mind) somehow mean the death of me. Which isn’t the slightest bit true.

The situations that I am going through right now have opened up the floodgates of fear. I am learning all of this new material that doesn’t quite fit with the way that I’ve been taught. But somehow, I know that it’s necessary for me to move on from my old ways of thinking. They are no longer serving me, nor helping me move towards the life I am trying to grow into.

With great change comes more responsibility. Being responsible for my own life is one of the hardest things that I am learning how to cope with. You mean to tell me that I am responsible for creating my own reality? You have got to be kidding me. You mean to tell me that I can no longer blame things on my upbringing. Shoot me now. You mean to tell me that I can no longer blame God for the awful things that have happened in my life? It’s all up to me? I don’t think so. 

How can anyone deal with all of that information coming at them faster than a freight train?

No wonder I’m having panic attacks. I am being asked to cultivate things within me that I never even knew existed – like in real life.

Allow the universe to show you its magic? What the hell does that mean?

You don’t have to work so hard; it can be easy? Are you kidding me? I’ve worked hard all my life, and for very little at times.

All you need is inside of you? You mean my happiness doesn’t have anything to do with my job, my husband, or the things that I receive? I’ve searched for this shit everywhere, and it’s been here all that time?

The truth is, I’ve learned that all the answers are really inside.

{Renee Brooks}

How you feel about your life is very telling. Not only does it tell you what you are currently putting out into the universe, it also gives you a clear picture of your future.

So how do you get a hold on those “out of control” feelings – those feelings that seem to manifest out of nowhere – no matter how hard you try to get rid of them?

Well, I’ve learned a few things through decoding my dreams, writing my new book, and by studying some great philosophers.

The first thing that you have to realize is that you have everything you are seeking, inside of you. You have compassion inside, you have forgiveness inside, and you have understanding inside.

You just haven’t exercised that power.

Last night in the middle of my panic attack I was feeling so helpless. I did something that my inner being encouraged me to do.

I turned inside. 

I balled up my fist, put my hand of my heart, closed my eyes, and repeated,

If I don’t have anything else, I have myself.

{Renee Brooks}

 It took only a few minutes to soothe my anxious heart. My breathing slowed down, my heart-rate returned to normal, and I could feel knots of tension release from my body. I knew in those moments that I could go to that place within – at any time. I had experienced a new place inside of myself. A place of truth – my inner sanctum.

That is what my soul was calling from me. It was calling me to recognize my ability to turn my thoughts of panic and fear into knowing and reassurance. It was calling me to realize that I could find my way “home” quicker and that I didn’t have to feel helpless when any sign of panic showed up. It was calling me to realize that I didn’t have to wander around in the darkness afraid.

Once you learn to define what you are experiencing, you take the eeriness out of it.  

So here it goes – My panic attacks are happening because I am going through a period of darkness. By darkness, I don’t mean that there are creatures out to get me, that I’m possessed, or that I am doomed.

All darkness is, is the navigation through one’s life – without the proper light.

{Renee Brooks} 

My optimism, faith, and trust is not there because I am in a stage of the unknown. I’ve never navigated through a sea this strong before, and I’m afraid.

I’ve never stepped up and declared what I wanted out of life – without anyone’s input.

I’ve never dropped all things before to follow my dreams. 

I’ve never been without a job and called from myself the strength to move forward alone as my own boss. 

I’ve never told the truth inside about not feeling right about some of the things I was taught. 

Yet now, I am in the middle of all of this transformation – seemingly alone.

I am learning to find my way “home” in the midst of darkness. I am learning how to navigate through uncertain periods. You don’t have to know which way the wind is going to blow. You just have to know how to navigate the ship.

This realization does not mean that I will never experience anymore panic attacks. It just means that when you look inside, you have a deeper understanding of yourself and the world around you, and it makes more of a difference than you may think. Looking inside helped me steady myself in the middle of a terrible panic attack. It helped me realize that the place inside I experienced is always there. It helped me realize that I don’t need anyone or anything outside of myself to feel whole. All you have is right inside. Sometimes the circumstances have to get unstable enough for you to actually seek & find.

Thank you for reading!

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