My Minds Made Up
There comes a time in everyone’s life when they have to decide what they really want. I am not talking about the “appropriate” ideas that we put out into the world or the front that we create to be socially acceptable. I am talking about the things that our heart truly desires. I am a 31 year old female holding onto what seems like a pipe dream. I aspire to be a well-known and successful author. Without support, trust worthy friends, and help, that dream is nearly impossible to realize.
I realize that it is time for me to take full responsibility for where I would like my life to go. It is now or never. I have found some peace in writing. For once in my life, through writing, I am able to be in control. When I write I don’t have people telling me what to do, how to perform, or how to behave. When I write, I am just free to be me. The villain, the lover, the pacifist, the mother, the friend, or any other character that my imagination can dream up.
Living From The Heart Challenge
For 30 days I will be participating in a |||Living From The Heart Challenge|||. I have never given myself full permission to just indulge creatively without feeling guilty about not working or without feeling like I am neglecting my responsibilities. I have heard a great deal about the law of attraction and have even encountered some beautiful moments that I believe are directly related to me lining energy up. There were many negative things that I started to hear about the law of attraction, so I decided to stop being an active participant in “creating” my own destiny.
Somewhere along that line things went terribly wrong. I am the kind of person that has a very strict sense of responsibility and morality, but I have come to realize that denying that very part of my being is causing me more hell than I have ever been through in life. There are times when I can’t even breathe without questioning if I am doing it right. When you get to that point… you have to admit something has gone wrong.
So for the next 30 days, I am giving myself permission to live from my heart. To do the things that I am inspired to do, without any input what so ever from my inner critic, and trust me my inner critic deserves some kind of award for its performance. For 30 days I am going to stay in a positive frame of mind, write about the things I really want to see happen for my life, paint, dance, cry, or whatever else comes to mind. I will be posting poems, art, and parts of my diary online during this 30 day period.
My Intention For Sharing This
My intention for sharing this challenge with you is to give you the raw and unfiltered truth about what I experience during the 30 day period. This is not something that others have to follow. I just want to try this out for myself. There is something within my heart that tells me that my dreams are not worthless and that with pure intention my life can change. At the end of everyday I will post the most significant moments of my day. Like I said it could be poetry, a photo of what I’ve painted, entries from my journal, or news about any progress that I have made during the day. I am not sure where this will lead me to, but at the very least I hope I gain a new perspective on life that allows me to open and allow the things that are available for me instead of resisting all of the time. Wish me luck!